Sunday, October 19, 2008

60 and 425 Days to Go!!!!

60 days to go until our civil wedding and 425 days until our church wedding. Who would have thought that time flies so fast when you're in the thick of wedding preparations!!! For our civil wedding, the only thing left is to finalize the bookings and getting the marriage license. We hope to get the license on the 23rd (I hope that there is no line at the Makati City Hall) and finish the rest of the preparations the week after. Our work on our church wedding is still beginning. I know it is a very challenging undertaking but with Jeanie by my side, I know that we can accomplish it and have lots of fun at the same time. Come to think of it, its quite interesting that our first project as husband and wife is to plan our wedding. That's a chicken and egg situation for you :)

Over the next few days and weeks, I will chronicle all our preparations as we move closer to the 2 big days. Stay tuned..... :)

the ring that got lost

i was supposed to post this last wednesday but i was too busy so i am posting this only now. :)

or why i am blessed with the most wonderful boipren in the world.
as i am writing this, my entire condo is in a mess after i turned it upside down looking for my engagement ring.yes, i lost my ring.
part of my morning routine is putting on lotion and eversince i had the ring, it has been my pet peeve not to be able to put lotion on my left hand ring finger without getting some lotion on the ring. it's a weird oc thing. so every now and then, i would take off the ring when i put on the lotion, this was one of those mornings. after i was done, i started getting dressed for work. when i was putting on my earrings and watch, i realized that the ring wasn't where is should be. so i started moving around the things in my vanity table, rummagging through my bag and finally, down on my knees on the floor peering under the tables and my bed trying to look for it.
after almost 15 minutes of searching, i was already half in tears and in full panic mode. my unit is small and any missing object should be found in 10 minutes. it was a good thing boipren dropped by on his way to work after i told him i lost my ring. as i was trying to retrace my steps, he was assuring me that it would just be there when i get back. i was 90% sure i placed it on my vanity table but 10% was wondering if it slipped while i was going about my bathroom activities or worse, if i accidentally flushed it in the bowl.already i was thinking i was running late so i finally conceded and decided to postpone the search. seeing how disoriented i was, he offers to take me to work but i tell him to drop me off at the mrt station instead.
in the car, while rifling throug my bag, he was telling me to calm down and not to worry so much about it, it's just a ring. i know, i told him, in between my sniffles but i am crying because of its sentimental value. i am sad, i said because you gave it to me and i was careless and lost it. he tells me, it's just a ring, i can buy you a new one. it doesn't change anything between us, i will still marry you. and that made me cry even more. if i had known at that time how much the ring costs, i would've cried even more.
i made a quick stop at the post office to pick up a package that arrived but despite the new scrapbook goodies, i was still too sad, i didn't even open my package immediately like i always do. That’s how sad i was, i couldn’t even be distracted by scrapbook goodies. the 10% bathroom scenario was slowly gaining number on the probability scale. knowing that i would be too distracted at work and worrying myself about the ring, i decided to take my calls at home and asked boipren to take me back to the condo. when i got there, i started moving around everything in the condo in search for the ring - everything i can turn upside down, i one point, i was even contemplating uprooting the bowl. after leaving my condo in a mess, i was 50% worried that i lost my ring in the bathroom and i was also 50% insane so, yes, you guessed it, i stuck my hand in the bowl (the water was clean) and tried to check if the ring was there. i even called the lobby guard to ask if there was a way to retrieve the ring i lost in the bowl. he patiently explained the concept of the septic tank, its vastness and why there is no way i can get the ring. boy did the lobby guard get his dose of crazy that day.
so finally when it seemed that i really lost the ring to the bowl, i called up boipren. i was already crying and berating myself for being so careless. i asked him if he was mad and he said there's no point to him getting mad, instead he said, he'd just get me a new one. i told him, he doesn't have to. after all i thought, even if the ring just costs around 20000-50000, i still don't think it's practical to get another one.but out of curiosity, i asked him how much the ring costs and i gasped then almost choked when he told me. that ring could've paid for half of my condo or 2/3's of our big wedding budget! sorry, i still couldn't get over how such a small thing could cost so much. and really, unless you subject it to extreme physical stress test, who can tell the difference between white gold and platinum? i even suggested putting it somewhere safe and letting me wear one of those plastic rings with an edible candy for a stone. at least i can eat that.
see, despite my scrapbook sprees, i still maintain that i am more practical and money-wise than boipren. even up to now, i am 50% convinced about having a big wedding despite what boipren and my friends tell me that this is a once-in-a-lifetime event and i should do it for me. i still think the money would be better used as downpayment for a house. anyway, i digress.
so while i was talking to him, i was setting up my laptop to start working when out of the corner of my eye, i noticed something shiny at the edge of keys. yes, it was the ring. i think when i tucked away my laptop, i didn't realize my ring was in it. i was still crying that time but in a split second, i managed to shriek with tears in my eyes.
so finally i could tell boipren about the lengths i went through to find the ring and he was laughing so hard. he told me to wash my hands with soap, then with alcohol then with lotion and do this 10 more times. even then he tells me, he probably won't hold my hand.
i told him, we don't have such an exciting or outrageous story about our engagement - it was sweet and packed with kilig but it didn't have the usual bloopers or hilarity that has been the trademark of our stories. well, today, this morning, barely halfway through the day, i managed to have a story that we can tell our kids and our friends. the ring is back safe in my finger and yes my hand is thoroughly disinfected.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

the 4 early sunday morning sessions

and we finally completed our premarital counselling sessions in church!
when we were informed of our 11am-sunday-sessions, boipren and i had to readjust our weekend lifestyle otherwise known as the grand life of extreme couch potato. we would be asleep until lunch, alternating between the occasional quick bite and tv time. then after lunch, boipren would drop by the condo, i would be scrapping or watching tv, he would be surfing the net or playing with his laptop. then around 5, we would leave for church and attend the sunday vesper service.
we started with our first session on august 3 and we were both late - not a good first impression for our counsellors elder peping and tita liway. they were worried that if we started late we would not be able to make the most of our 1-hour sessions. during the first session, we talked about our family backgrounds, the dynamics of our relationship and why we wanted to get married. i think at that time, when i told them that we would have arguments and fights every week, they were wondering why we were even getting married. they reminded us how we need to put God in the center of our marriage, comparing Him to the center of the triangle and the two of us at opposite ends. the closer we get to the center which is God, the closer we are to each other.
during the second session, we we were early, which i think made up a bit for our previous tardiness. and also i think their impression of us improved a bit when they realized that despite our different temperaments and outlook, we actually share the same hopes and dreams for our future. they asked us to take a quiz separately on our perception of the roles and responsibilities of a husband and a wife. and surprisingly (not for us), we agreed on all the important points like:

  • i agreed to support my husband's decisions and not to say "i told you so" even if it doesn't turn out well

  • he agreed to continue courting me even after the wedding (yey scrapbook stuff!)

  • we both agree that we will get our own place when we get married, living with either of our parents is not an option. after all, part of us being ready for marriage is financial readiness which at the very least includes being able to provide for our needs.

  • we both agree we didn't want to take on jobs that would require us to be apart physically for more than a month. don't get me wrong, i admire couples who are able to subsist on seeing each other a month or two in a year and living on phone calls and chats for the rest. it's just not me, i am not a long-distance-relationship gal, and lucky for me, neither is boipren.
during the third session, we talked about our conflict management strategies to help us understand how each one of us approaches a a conflict. we were also asked to prepare a budget, separately of course, and compare if we have the same views on how we allocate our money. it wasn't difficult to come up with the budget as boipren and i have already discussed how we will do the budget even before we started with the sessions.
and finally, during our last session, we took a personality quiz (i am an infj and he is an entj/estj person). most of the things that were said about our personality were correct but i think what we found most helpful was getting a clearer picture of our strengths and weaknesses and the adjustments we need to make when we get married. we ended around the second week of september as we had to skip some sessions when our counsellors were out of town and i had to leave for japan.
we both learned a lot from those sessions (and we actually fight less now - either we improved on our communication or we've gotten more patient and slower to anger or we're getting too old to fight), and although this is not a guarantee for a happy marriage, this is something that can help us get started on the right track. we still have around 7 more sessions to go for this other young couples seminar we are attending twice a month at church, i will talk more about that in another post. but for now, let me leave you with a picture of our certificate of completion (my secure mode is on full gear so i blurred our middle names in case unscrupulous folks might use it for scams, better be paranoid than sorry right?). anyway, have a great weekend ahead everyone. :)

Monday, October 6, 2008

the favor prototype #1

this is just a quick post. i've been feeling guilty for neglecting the wedding preparations after we've settled on the venue a few weeks back. my feeling of inadequacy is further heightened upon seeing my friend who is also getting married doing more preparations - she has more ideas and have checked out mroe suppliers. hopefully, we can get on track when we attend another bridal fair this weekend.
we have not yet decided on a final motif, although it looks like we will both get what we want - gian and his midnight blue and me with my coral/poppy pink. i am eager to lock down the motif so i can start working on our favors, invites and maybe, our save the date cards.

here is a prototype of the wedding favor i was planning to make, i have to change the colors, of course. but i wanted something that i can easily mass produce and something that people can actually use. let me know what you think. enjoy the week ahead.